Voted the Keys Worst Hotel 2002-2003, Motel Hell Award 2003

Please see our very poor ratings at Worst reputation in the Keys and damned proud of it!

Photo Taken 1921,  when it still looked nice.
Penthouse our best room, the other rooms are much more disgusting than this. Every room is in disrepair and filthy. Every room has bugs, bugs and more bugs. We feature both German and Palmetto roaches imported weekly. Black ants are provided as food for the roaches. See our amazing "see through" towels, sinks and showers that never stop leaking and our uncomfortable sagging mattresses.
Situated in Islamorada with endless ocean views, our tropical storm surroundings offer a wide range of accommodations to choose from.  One and two bedroom dumps, villas from hell, inefficiencies and motel rooms offer a variety of *rates.  In room amenities include Noisy Air Conditioning, Low Quality Color Cable TV No Remotes and poor reception, Phone & occassional sloppy housekeeping.

Look hard you can see the fins!
Shark infested beach really thrills the kids (they think they are dolphins, how cute!). You will probably find the beach or your car a more comfortable place to sleep than your room, but beware, the "no see ums" will eat you alive!

While staying at Tropical Reef Resort, you can enjoy:
  • 3 Fresh Rainwater Pools & 1 Children's Pee Pond
  • Children's Playground with Fire Ants
  • Not much else

Playground is actually a giant ant mound!
Playground Guard Chester T. Molester and Kids

Boy are we gassed!
Drunks and Alcholics Welcome here, the more you drink the less you notice how run down and filthy the hotel is.

Be abused and treated like dirt by our chemically imbalanced manager, Shirlay Rhoades , and other staff. All of our staff are trained in Criminal Hotel and Motel Management and are skilled in "bait and switch tactics", credit card fraud, rudeness, abuse, general dishonesty and deceptive practices. Our housekeepers speak little english and are filthy little third world brown type slobs that have no clue what clean is.

Spend the afternoons in a drunken brawl on our beach or get out on the water in a leaky rental boat.  Discover the underwater world of our once living coral reef. 

Ask about our unique Florida Keys Wedding Packages. We will make your Wedding a nightmare to remember. We will piss off and over charge all of your wedding guests, your wedding guests will never speak to you again and will want their gifts back. Shortly after you are married here or honeymoon here, you will be ready to divorce or kill the asshole that suggested this place for your wedding.

Economy Villians - sleeps 2 $85.00 to whatever we can get! $75.00 whatever we can get!
Large Villas - dirty bedroom/kitchen/dining area with shower or bath that do not work.  Can sleep 5 $95.00 to whatever we can get! $85.00 to whatever we can get!
Extra Large Villas - 2 bedroom.  Can sleep 6 to 8 in filthy living conditions! $130.00 for 4
$165.00 for 4
$200.00 for 4 - Executive suite
$100.00 for 4
$125.00 for 4
$150.00 for 4 - Executive Suite
Economy Motel our "rooms from hell series"! $70.00 $60.00
Poolside Motel Rooms - Party with the drunks poolside till 4 AM in the morning.
sleeps 3 - 5
$90.00 $80.00
Extra Deluxe Motel Rooms - Extra large ants and roaches.
2 full size sagging beds and a filthy refrigerator
$95.00 w/ balcony
$80.00 w/o balcony
$100.00 w/ balcony
$85.00 w/o balcony
Pet House Villa - Pay More for Less $300.00 (for 2) $250.00 (for 2)
Pet House Studio - our "dirty gas station bathroom series"! $150.00 (for 2) $125.00 (for 2)
Pet House Studio/Villa Combo - Twice the misery for more money. $350.00 (for 4) $250.00 (for 4)
*All rooms have ants and roaches * You will be overcharged! * You will be overcharged!

Holiday and special events are at regular rates.  3 night minimum stay required during holidays and special events.   2 night minimum stay on weekends.  Rates given are for single or double occupancy per unit.  Extra persons are $10.00 each.  Children 12 and under stay FREE (2 maximum).  $6.00 each additional child.  Check-in time 3 PM.   Check-out time is 11 AM.  Reservations require VISA or MASTERCARD.   Cancellation notice within one week.  No checks please.  We gladly accept travelers checks. We reserve the right to over charge your credit card at any time. We screw everyone!

Bringing your own boat?   Our dockage includes use of the boat ramp and trailer space.  $10.00 per day for small boats only.  Larger boats pay $0.60 per foot/per day ($20.00 per day minimum).

For further information, or to inquire about reservations,
please contact Tropical Reef Resort and Marina at 305-664-8881, by
e-mail or fill out the form below.

Idiot's Name
Street address
Address (cont.)
Zip/Postal code
Home Phone
Arrival Date
Departure Date The same as arrival date if you have any sense.
# Persons We will charge extra anyway!

Tropical Reef Resort
"The Motel From Hell"
84977 Overseas Highway
Islamorada, Florida Keys 33036
(305) 664-8881 or 800-887-3373

Hotel Califonia ~ Eagles

Voted the Keys Worst Hotel 2002-2003, Motel Hell Award 2003

Please see our very poor ratings at Worst reputation in the Keys and damned proud of it!