Capt. John, the Captain formerly known as handsome. Greetings from Capt. John, Scuba Florida 
September 2003 Circulation 2,801

June - Too Soon! July - Fly By! August, September - Remember! December - All over!
~ Island Saying reminding children that August to December is the hurricane season.

Current Conditions Gulf of Mexico

Richard's 50 Lb. Plus Gag Grouper
Richard Daniel's Prize Gag

EJ and Richard with Prize Winning Snappers!
Barrett's Mutton, Daniel's Red

Richard Daniel, EJ Barrett take 3rd, 4th and 5th in the Southern Open Tourney.

Richard and EJ's big Gags and Snapper scoured in the Southern Open. Taken at depths of 160' plus these are some really great fish.

My pal Del Arduengo, his pals Kenny Veenstra and Mark Kelly did really well 50 miles offshore. Check out their catch lower right.

Hot! Vis is still great! Water is still warm. Dive the Gulf!

Gulf temps are in the 82 degree area. Bring a bath robe! We have been having some of the best vis in years for this time of the year.

Additional info at:

EJ and Richard with Prize Winning Gag Grouper
EJ Barrett and Richard Daniel

Del's nice catch!
Del Arduengo's Catch


Scallop Season July 1st to September 11th.



Hurry Scallop Season Closes September 11th 2003!

There are still plenty of Scallops in the Crystal River area! The Big Ones are in now! Scallops are one of the most delectable foods to come from the sea. They are so rich that a little goes a long way.

I will be booking Scallop Trips from July to September 11th when the season closes. Full boat with guide $250.00 or $60.00 per person, 6 hours of fun!


Crystal River


Student photos of Manatee
Manatee at 3 Sisters

Manatees! There are still Manatees at Crystal River. There are 50 or in the park all year round, but you have to look a little harder to find them. I always find manatee!

Additional info on manatees at: and

Student photos of manatee.

Take lessons this month or the kitten gets you!
Don't make him do it

  • September 13th and 14th Advanced, Nitrox, Deep Diver Courses.
  • September 20th and 21st Open Water Course.Snorkel/Dive 9/21/03
  • September 27th and 28th Open Water Course. Snorkel/Dive 9/27/03
  • October 4th and 5th Open Water Course. Snorkel/Dive 10/05/03

Schedule cont'd

  • Night Dive Every Saturday Night ~ Adventure Advanced Dive Every Sunday that classes are scheduled!
  • Weekend Courses Available every weekend in September and October 2003
  • Private classes available during the week. Gulf Dives and Scalloping Available everyday!
  • Rescue and Divemaster course available throughout September/October 2003 

See: and for additional information.

Former students may go diving on training days for tune-ups and fun ($15.00 per person, plus cost of dive, if applicable)


Why Capt. John wears underwear on his head!


The "Official" Davy Crockett Coon Skin Cap wouldn't work...

Road Kill headwear.
"Real" Coonskin Cap

  for my purposes. Besides wearing it 24/7 for a year in and out of the hot Florida sun had made the "official" fake fur smell like road kill.

One of the things I fondly remember were the games my younger brother Chris and I would play. With a few props we could be any super hero. A towel around the neck and your were Superman. Leaping from couch to chair and flying around the room like jumping beans we'd play for hours. Later the towels, draped over a few chairs would become a tent in darkest Africa. I can still make the Tarzan yell! I am compelled to do it anytime I am under a bridge with the right acoustics!

One of our favorite TV shows was Sea Hunt. Mike Nelson, Freelance Underwater Investigator, was our hero.

All of the Russell kids were water folk. We visited Sanlando Springs (site of the Tarzan TV series), Rock Springs in Apopka and we spent many a weekend at Daytona or Cocoa Beach. We could swim about as soon as we could walk.

So Mike Nelson being our hero is not hard to figure. Brother and I would don our "Voit" round window masks, and with rubber knives, hunt down those "hose cutters*" (bad guys) that were always after Mike.


Mike Nelson Free Lance Underwater Investigator
Mike Nelson (Lloyd Bridges) and his famous hood.

Mike always wore a hood when he dove and made a big production of putting the hood on before he hit the water. So our outfits were not complete without a hood! We found that our jockey underwear were just the ticket. So to complete our underwater wardrobe, we'd put undies on our heads before our masks. We played this game so often that mom would warn us to put clean underwear on our heads, in case we had an accident or a hose cutter got us and we ended up in the hospital with the "bends".

Funny how things turn out. I am a Freelance Private Investigator and a scuba diver. I don't do underwater investigations because in the back of my mind I still fear that there are hose cutters around.


Capt. John with undies on his head!
Capt. John, black undies on head!

No doubt that the path I chose in life was directly linked to Sea Hunt. Oh yeah, I still like to wear undies on my head.

Laura Hampton was right, "It’s funny to think that wearing your underwear on your head can get you where you want to be (see Laura's Poem, The PantyGods, in Cool Web below)."

* See related Mike Nelson story at


Stars Wars Kid ~ SWK


A couple of months ago I included some urls on
the "Star Wars Kid" in Cool Web.

Clips fro the original SWK video
Star Wars Kid ~ the Scenes from the Original

Ghyslain Raza, a fat kid from Canada, filmed himself as he pretended to wield a "light saber" Star Wars style. His pals found the video, uploaded it and in short time Ghyslain has become an internet star.

The original video shows the kid awkwardly twirling a golf ball retriever like "
Star Wars" bad guy Darth Maul, and has been downloaded hundreds of thousands of times.


Web sites have been dedicated to the kid. Supporters have raised money for him. Techies have created their own "clone" versions of the video, adding sound and visual effects or placing his image in any number of backdrops from "The Hulk" to "The Matrix." To date over 95 versions of the original have been re-mixed. More versions pop up everyday.

Ghyslain does not like his new found fame and has filed suit against the kids that stole the video and their parents. I viewed several of the these videos including the original and laughed till I almost cried. I loved the kids ability to amuse himself and his imagination. His awkward movements added to the joke! It reminded me of the dumb ass stuff I used to do as a kid. It is a shame the kid can't laugh at himself and is so focused on those that are laughing at him. He should know that we are laughing with him
First the Kid should be basking in his "15 minutes of fame", making money and exploiting this to the max. Second he should be wearing underwear on his head!

I should be so lucky! I wish I had videos of me when I "acted the fool" as a kid, I could be rich! Laura and I get it, too bad you don't SWK!

Star Wars Kid Sites

Cool Web



Photos of People Wearing Underwear on Their Heads ~ Warning some are naked!

The Panty Gods ~
Poem about wearing undies on your head.

New Dutch Craze, Wearing undies on your head ~
Cool I thought of it first!

Crystal River Web Cam ~ New website and domain for Crystal River. Web cam overlooks King's Spring and New Manatee Facts Pages. My new web site:


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Contact Me

Boycott Bottled Water! Truth and Humor, Click here!

Captain John Russell

813-966-6525 Cell Phone 24/7


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� Copyright, Captain "Handsome" John L. Russell 3 1998-2003, all rights reserved (all lefts reserved too)! Violators will be slowly beaten to death. Last revised 09 Feb 2006.